11 PM - Christal Earle’s Blog

When we pulled up to his house, I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. I think that in my mind, someone who is 80 should look a certain way: tired, frail, contemplative…but not this dude. In his slippers, jeans and a great retro snowflake sweater, he marched down the front steps of his house, walked towards Vaden and I and grabbed our hands in a firm handshake. His eyes were bright blue, warm, and perceptive…I instantly loved him.

Gerrard lives in Glovertown, Newfoundland, and he has become another face and story in my ever-growing list of personal heroes. Along with his 50 year old Thai wife and his 15 year old son, Gerrard has traveled the world, lived among the poor, and helped to generate the resources to build over 650 wells to bring clean water to the villages where the wells were dug–all in the last 20 years! This man is definitely no slug: when he was 61, just before he met his wife (!) he decided to hitch hike across Australia and into Asia. While he was traveling, he found desperately poor mountain villages in remote India, and realized that if he didn’t do something, who would? So, in response to what he saw, he returned to Canada with his new wife and started H.A.V.E (Help a Village Effort). Through his own network, Gerrard organized fundraising walks, awareness events, and advocacy efforts for the people he had met who had no voice. Every year he would go out to the field with his family and see the projects, meet the people, and live among them for a few weeks, in order to better understand how they could be served.

On the coffee table in his house were some light reading material, such as Global Economics books, National Geographic, and Social Justice works. His organization this year has a goal of 200 wells, and the oversight of the project is all run from a little rickety photocopier, one late model computer, and a lot of passion!

People like Gerrard remind me that there is never a time to stop believing and dreaming; there is never a time to let go of hope and vision. As we sat in their small living room, I was humbled by his praise of what we did and feeling a little convicted of not doing more. Gerrard represents a remnant that I believe can become a wave of help, hope, and mercy, and he reminds me why we need to keep pushing forward.

Last year, on May 28, on my brother’s birthday, I wrote about losing him, and why the limp that I walk with has turned into something beautiful. It was May 27 that I met Gerrard, and as we were sitting in his living room, I thought about how much has happened this past year that has helped to shape and mould my life and perspective. When I watched Gerrard’s animated face as he described the people that he laboured to help, I thought of how much more of life there is to give away-that there is always another opportunity if we are willing to take it.

Thank you, Gerrard for who you are and what you have done. In this lifetime, you won’t fully know the lives that have been helped because of your kindness and compassion, but you can rest well each night knowing that you are doing your best. You have challenged me to get creative again and dream even bigger, and for that, I am eternally grateful!

When we were in Thailand this past March, there was a little girl there who had the most amazing smile. In my heart, her name is Hla, which is Burmese for beautiful.  She was about 8 years old, and from Burma (Myanmar). Her parents had sold her to traffickers when she was very small to help pay for feeding the rest of the family, and she does not remember where they were from. When I inquired further, one of the staff at the home told me that they moved down to the capital city, Rangoon, shortly after selling her.

Hla is a testimony to the beauty and innocence of childhood. She has the greatest smile that makes her eyes shine and pulls on my heart every time I see it. She is incredibly smart, and knows a remarkable amount of English, considering it is just what she has picked up vicariously along the way.  Probably the most profound thing about her young life is that she willingly trusts adults that are in her life now. She allows them to hug her and will often reach out to hold one of their hands, despite the pain and abuse she has suffered at the hands of adults that have been in her life in the past.

I have been thinking about little Hla all week, as I anxiously watch the devastation of the Cyclone that hit Burma. This morning I woke up to the headlines that said that UN officials fear that there are more than 100,000 people dead as a result. As a result of what? Of a cyclone and tidal wave? No, they are dead as a result of an evil regime that refused to even warn the people that it was coming. They sat back in their wealth and comfort and literally ignored the impending doom that was about to strike their shores. As I look at pictures of the devastation,  my heart breaks. What can one person do in the face of such total destruction? The evil of poverty is that it always leaves it’s victims open to exploitation, danger, and to be victimized.

And the whole time,I think of little Hla’s face as she blurts out English words that she is proud to try out on me. I think of her little hand in mine and remember that her parents could possibly be trapped somewhere in that devastation - or worse- have lost their lives there. Hla believes in her heart that they will someday return for her. Amazing…the very people that through desperation or sheer ignorance, gave permission to people to exploit her and steal her innocence, are the same people that she longs to be reunited with. To her, they are worth trusting again and believing in.

In those piles of bodies that we see in the pictures and reports, there is more than just rotting flesh. There are letters that were never written, words that were never spoken, reconciliation that was never achieved, love that was never lived out, dreams that were cut short, and injustice that was never avenged. There are mothers and fathers, and sons and daughters that were separated forever and all because the force of nature combined with the selfish irrationality of humanity is a deadly cocktail.

Tonight, I will pray for Hla and for her long lost family.  In fact, I pray for all my Burmese family.  I can’t call myself a person of compassion if I don’t see their plight as my own. I believe that they need someone to believe in them and for them, and to take action because of what that compassion can produce.  I can do that. I can see them through the eyes of compassion and non-judgment.  Because I love their sons and daughters, they are my family too, and my mom once gave me wise words that I continually remind myself of all the time: “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family”.

So, Burmese family, wherever you are tonight, I pray that you are safe, free from harm, and that you would go to bed in peace knowing that someone believes in you…I will be your voice, and my love will have action in all that it professes.

I had the craziest dream last night. I dreamed there was this string attached to my tongue, and no matter what I did, I couldn’t pull the stupid thing out: it just kept growing and growing! Try as I might, it still kept coming.  I would cut it and keep pulling, but I could never get to the end of the source. Weird. Creepy, actually. I woke up thinking about this dream, and thinking that maybe I could learn something from it, or maybe I was thinking about something so much that I just dwelt on it the whole night in my subconcious.

I think I know what it is: it’s the longing for a do-over. You know what I mean: like when you are playing golf and you totally screw up the shot, you give yourself a do-over. Or when you are shooting hoops and you totally mess it up, you give yourself a do-over. Or if you are Christal, and you are playing tennis with your husband, you often serve the ball and then frustrate him because you beg for a do-over!

How much different would life be if we could all take a do-over every now and then? Like the ‘get out of jail free card’ in Monopoly-you don’t deserve it, but you get it anyways. There are countless moments in my life where I wish I could just snap my fingers and get a do-over: when my mouth runs away on me (daily), when I get busted for speeding (annually), when I forget an important appointment (weekly), when I wish I would have been wiser with my money (my whole life) or when I wish I could get the time back and have done something different with it.

However, a do-over only seems to exist in the pretend world. Life is about taking responsibility for my actions and determining who I choose to be no matter where I find myself. Sometimes I can beat myself up for hours or days, when I think about something stupid that I said or did. I can even blush when I recall something years later, because I just wish I could have done things differently. I am a public speaker. I am on a stage continually, and no matter how often I step up there, when I get down and walk away, there is that vulnerable moment where I wished I would have done something different, or I wonder what people are thinking. It can be emotional hell just wondering if you are going to be loved by the audience and if they are going to be affected by what you say. Many moments, walking down those steps and away from the platform, I wish for a do-over.

But alas, this is not reality. Do-overs only exist in childhood games and cheating golfers - it is not how life really works. In some ways, reality is better than make believe, because we can choose the do-over before it needs to be done. When I think about what the world would be like if we took this approach, it is a beautiful picture: slavery wouldn’t exist because people would have enough foresight to realize that exploitation in any form only causes deeper rooted problems the longer it is left unchecked. Injustice wouldn’t have the same weight, because we would realized that the only way for there to be true peace is by truth and justice.  The simplest of all acts, forgiveness, would eliminate wars and allow children to grow old.  And the greatest of gifts, friendship, would never be jeopardized, because we would realize that friends always choose to prefer each other and that love covers over a multitude of sins…

Today is Monday, and I just got back from an awesome early morning run with my friend, Nettie. I actually hauled myself out of bed and kept a commitment to something that I know I need to be doing. It feels good to be wide awake and not lying in bed, staring at the clock and wishing for a do-over.  At this time of the day, life can seem quite clearly laid out before you, and you can stay objective about what the day can hold. I wish that I was always this clear-headed, but I think it might be the caffeine that I am currently ingesting, to be honest with you!  The best part is that so far, I am not yet wishing for any do-overs…yet.